A forest, or a similar rustic area. The lodging we were at, was simple, unkept, but we had a roof over our heads so it was enough. It was like a group of hippies or some living community had moved into these simple cabins in the woods a long time ago, but had never performed a decent act of remodeling or cleaning in their entire time there. It wasn’t dirty though, just shabby and when there were things that needed fixing, the one doing the fixing wasn’t very precise or handy. It all worked though, and the atmosphere was perfect. I met J there as I arrived. He was wearing shorts, his blue shirt that I love, and his hair was just as perfect as it was in July last year. He was excited to see me, as I walked through the door over the little wobbly bridge (it was a tree house after all). That part of the house was either roofless, or had a glass roof, because it felt like we were immediately surrounded by all these trees, such a calm and peaceful environment. I wanted to hug and passionately kiss him, and after he had let me savage him for a sec, he said, “Hold on, wait. I want to do the ‘pauser’ or ‘breather’ or ‘relaxer’ (not sure exactly what word he used but it was a very specific term for the kind of kiss he had in mind)”.
I knew immediately knew what kind of kiss he wanted, and I watched him shut his eyes, hold his lips barely apart, and as he stood there in the middle of the room, so, so close to me, I moved another inch closer. I opened my mouth just the tiniest bit too, and as I tilted my head slightly, moved my head cheek to his. My hair lightly brushed his shoulder and he shivered as he put one hand on my hip. His eyes were still closed, and I gently let my lips touch his. Neither of us moved – we stood there completely frozen, mouths relaxed and connecting, as we breathed each other in. Micro-muscular movements in both our mouths and our heaving chests were the only visible sign of the energy exchange between us, but it was like the world around us had ceased to exist altogether; all I could notice was the electricity running from him to me and vice versa. He pressed his stomach to mine, so I could feel him breathe. I almost lost control for a second, tempted to break the magic by kissing him deeper, but the movement of his torso brought me straight back into the moment. There was not telling where his soul ended and where mine began. As we stood there breathing, touching, it was like he had poured into me and I into him and it was the most intense and sensual feeling of oneness in the world. After what seemed like minutes, I took a minuscule step back – he still had his arms around me, and I drew a deep breath in. He grinned as he looked at me from head to toe. “Ha, can you only hold your breath for 37 seconds, missus?” He laughed. I was a bit embarrassed, had it only been 37 seconds? I stammered, trying to explain how something this intense was about to overwhelm me, how I loved kissing him like this, but that I was about to pass out from the intensity. He grinned, kissed my lips again, and said “I’m joking babe, it was perfect”.
We moved further into the glass covered cabin, although it wasn’t big. It was long, narrow, but with funny corners and little rooms here and there. There was some furniture, like.. Wooden chaise lounges, or two larges chairs pushed together to form a temporary bed, something to take a nap on. Now I think of it, there were two shower cabins next to each other, like the ones you have at a campsite, bottom and top of the door open so you can see a pair of feet peek out from underneath. I had finished showering before J had (not sure why I wasn’t in the shower with him, but maybe I wanted to give him that little space alone to clean up after the trip to the cabin. I did peek over the edge of the door to check if it was him in there, and he laughed, tried to hide his body parts, which I though was funny, but I closed my eyes and just waved at him, told him not to worry, that I wasn’t peeking or hadn’t seen anything, but that I just wanted to make sure it was him in there. I walked away to dry myself off.
Then, back to the chairs; somehow we had ended up on them, laying in each others arms. I was in complete bliss mode – this was the feeling I had been waiting for for so long. He laid on his back, to my right, and I was laying on my right side. His left arm was under me, hugging me, as my head was on his shoulders, my left arm spread across his chest. I had my left leg pulled over his legs, and every inch of my body was touching his. He had his right arm around my back. His shoulders were soft and warm, and his t-shirt smelled nice. I was half awake, half asleep, half in a state of blissful high, and at some point, as we were laying there, my mom walked by to check if we were okay. She saw the grin on my face as she passed by and knew all was well; She’d never seen me happier than I was there in the arms of my man.
And here comes the best part. I looked up to his face, and he looked at me in a kind of wonder and confusion. I kissed him softly on the lips. He gasped and smiled and still looked amazed and puzzled. I grinned and kissed him again. It was like he was mumbling to himself, when he said “Wow, I really have to admit that I am falling for this girl… It’s like our souls are connected or something” I can’t remember the exact words, but I remember the sheer bliss that oozed from his face when he said it, like… Us meeting for the third time was a charm, that he didn’t allow himself before to believe that it was possible to love another person that much, or knowing you loved another person this much after having met in person just twice… It was like something clicked in his head, like… “Yep, This is really it, she is it, and I can finally allow myself to trust that it’s true.”
My arms were still resting across chest, and I could feel his heart beating as he said those words. Mine skipped a beat, his went a little bit faster. I barely lifted my head and looked at the soft lines on his face. This is pure bliss.
I dreamed this in the early morning of 24 March.